Personality Overload

Data collection is over. Repeat that, Data collection is over.

The weight of relief that is off my shoulders is astronomical. I would be jumping for joy if my sinus headache would allow it. Instead, I am loving this piece of information quietly and settling in on my couch with homemade chicken noodle soup, a good movie and the promise of carving pumpkins tomorrow with the Mr.

For those who don't know, my thesis research has been going on since last Wednesday, the 13th. That is, I have been at the NC State Fair for 10 straight days, and quite frankly I don't want to see it again for quite some time, like a year. For my research I needed to survey kids showing livestock at the fair between the ages of 16-21. It was a lot of being personable, smiling, being talkative and inquisitive. (Special shout out to those who suffered with me: The Always Helpful Mr. Jeff, My Office Wife Ms. Lendy, and the Ever Cheerful Mr. Michael along with my NCDA buddies, and last but not least, my Momma, from 500 miles away).

Typically, I consider myself a personable person, a people person, it's why I chose Extension. I love talking to people, I love finding out what they are doing, and at the beginning I thought I got pretty lucky at my research. I got to be at a place I like (the fair), talking to people I like (farmers and their kids) talking about stuff I like (their farms, 4-H, FFA, leadership). Grant it, I am extremely lucky with my research, because looking back I still didn't have that bad of a time. I was worried about response rate but ended up with 67%, (unofficially, still need a final count). But by today I just realized something about myself talking to my momma.

I was tired of begging. I am an independent person, no shock there. I don't like depending on others to get my work done. That's probably the worst part of my thesis for me; knowing that the fate of my degree rests in the hands of 16-21 year olds. I had a slight panic attack when I realized that. It was the beginning of the fair, one of the big days that three species were checking in at once. I realized that my fate rests in the hands of high schoolers who don't even know who I am. Wooooooooo. Had to remind myself to breathe. After that panic attack, we move on to.......

Personality overload.
Now as said previously, I like talking to people. But by today, I had enough. I'm sick (literally have a cold) and tired (sleep deprived) and just did not have it in me. It was down to my last two groups of show kids, dairy cattle and dairy goats. I walked the barns this morning, it was horrendous. One round produced 4 surveys. Wait ten minutes, another round produced 2. It's harder with people that you have never seen before in my life. By the end of the beef Jr. shows I was feeling good. I know most of the people, the parents recognize me from helping out for the past 4 years, and they don't mind pestering their own kids to take my survey. Again with the other species, I at least knew someone who was showing to help me out and point me in the right direction. This weekend I was completely lost and I don't like feeling lost. Cue my personality problem.

Because of my complete cold turkey walk-ups and the combination of the cold and exhaustion, I feel like I didn't give it my all today. I just wasn't into it. I got sick of talking to people. It came to the point where I felt like people were harder to talk to and it was disappointing as well as frustrating. It's when I decided to call it off, do a final count and consult with the higher powers. These higher powers turned out to be Drs. Bruce, Croom, and Jones, who got called in to see how good 63% looked. That is, 133 out of 210 surveys. I got a good job from the later, but the ever pushing advisor edged me on. It's funny about expectations, if someone raises them for you, you usually rise to meet them. More on that later, and my gratefulness for those people in my life.

"When we long for life without difficulties, remind us that oaks grow strong in contrary winds and diamonds are made under pressure."

A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood.........

Fall is in the air, and I couldn't be happier :)



I was just thinking today that I am so grateful my thesis research is going on now, because any other season and I just might not make it through. It has been a rough go at it, but thankfully, the data collection should be over very soon.

State fair season is typically one that I look forward to every year. It's my time to help out with the cattle shows, something that I always enjoy doing. However, this year the state fair was tarnished for me with my data collection. Mind you, I do want to do a thesis, and I constantly need to remind myself of that, it was just such a drag :( It was and continues to be a lot of stress. I hate having to depend on other people, like the office lady's at the fair for a master list of exhibitors, and depending on others to get me a parking pass, and others to actually fill out the survey. I hate having to beg, it's just not in me; but for the past five days I have been putting on a happy face and begging people to take my survey. It is damn tiring. Yesterday I slept in, then fell asleep in the afternoon, and again last night.... oops. Thankfully, I have an understanding boyfriend who is keeping me sane through all of this.

Hopefully the next few weeks will bring a mini-vacation for the boyfriend and I, some down time, carving pumpkins and relaxing. Hopefully.... but as the life of a grad student goes, something will inevitably come up.

Is it sad that I am so looking forward to Thanksgiving?